14 March 2025 – I’ve been trying to set up this page for days, just so I could finally start writing. And now that I’ve done it. I made my coffee, sat down in front of the computer… And I have no idea what to write. God…
15 March 2025 – I’m sipping my fourth cup of red berry tea. My favorite song is playing in the background. I’m just thinking about how deeply grateful I am for everything. I’m traveling the world, I have food on my table and a life I’ve built on my own, one that smells of peace. I’m thankful for all my efforts, for everything that happened and didn’t happen. Today, I feel a thousand times grateful for every single thing that brought me to this life I’m living. And yet… if only I could fall in love. If only I could meet the right person at the right time and take a deep breath in the safety of someone’s arms — maybe then, everything would feel a little clearer. This is what it means to be a woman, isn’t it? You can do it all and still not be able to meet your emotional needs by yourself. The strange thing is, I’ve never had a problem being loved. Well, maybe once. Anyway, my problem is with loving someone. Everyone wants someone who mirrors themselves, and that’s why I can’t lower my standards. I stay in my masculine energy most of the time because I never feel close enough to someone to show them my feminine side. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve been told, “You don’t even have a heart,” but the truth is I’m probably the most sensitive, emotionally aware person I know. People just prefer blaming others rather than accepting they weren’t loved so I let it go, I let them say what they want.In two days, I’ll be in Italy. For some reason, it feels like there’s a story waiting for me there.
And I love that feeling.
I love not knowing what time will bring.
I love that as long as we’re alive, there’s still hope.
Am I jumping from one topic to another? Who cares.